Stone Brewing Arrogant Bastard Box
Brewery: Stone Brewing Co.
Style: American Strong Ale
Format: 650ml Bottle
One Box. Four Bastards. We’re unleashing our new espresso-enhanced behemoth, 2015 DEPTH-CHARGED Double Bastard Ale, and bringing back OAKED Arrogant Bastard Ale exclusively in this highly sought-after four-pack, which also features the liquid legend that started it all and its amped-up big brother. ONE BOTTLE OF:
Arrogant Bastard Ale
This is an aggressive ale. You probably won’t like it. It is quite doubtful that you have the taste or sophistication to be able to appreciate an ale of this quality and depth. We would suggest that you stick to safer and more familiar territory–maybe something with a multi-million dollar ad campaign aimed at convincing you it’s made in a little brewery, or one that implies that their tasteless fizzy yellow beverage will give you more sex appeal. Perhaps you think multi-million dollar ad campaigns make things taste better. Perhaps you’re mouthing your words as you read this.
2015 Double Bastard Ale
Originally brewed to celebrate the one-year anniversary of Arrogant Bastard Ale, Double Bastard Ale debuted in November 1998 as an amped-up version of that already aggressive beer. A huge malt bill and an unreasonable amount of hops make this ale one that will be appreciated by only a few, and that’s just fine with us. We didn’t brew this dark amber monster to please anyone other than ourselves.
OAKED Arrogant Bastard Ale – EXCLUSIVE TO THIS 4-PACK
Too many strive towards complacency as a goal. We grow up thinking that the ability to become complacent is the equivalence of success in life. True Arrogant Bastards know that this could not be further from the truth. The real beauty, richness and depth in life can only be found if the journey through life itself is looked upon as a constant chance to learn, live and find life’s passion. Passion threatens the complacent, and fills them with fear. Fear of the new, the deep and the different. We, on the other hand, seek it out. Endlessly, joyously...and aggressively. To this end we bring you “OAKED Arrogant Bastard Ale.” Another reward for those seeking new sources of passion, and another point of dissension for those who are not.
2015 DEPTH-CHARGED Double Bastard Ale – EXCLUSIVE TO THIS 4-PACK
So, your knowledge of caffè is such that you’ve correctly determined that “depth-charged” refers to the addition of espresso-roasted coffee beans. Well, bully for you. For all I know, you picked that up hanging out at some coffee megachain amid a microcosmic mishmash of vapid layabouts, metro hipsters, and laptop-sporting exhibitionists trying to convince the world (and themselves) that they’re click-clacking out the great American-novel-cum-screenplay for a future summer blockbuster. I could surely teach you a thing or two were I inclined…which I’m NOT. Perhaps you’re eyeing my backside because you’re really into coffee. Nothing wrong there, but if you’ve come to me expecting some beery incarnation of your security blanket “me time” soyfrappélatte or similarly dainty concoction, you’re in for some grande-sized disappointment. I do not exist to provide a comforting mode of conveyance for your jittery, caffeinated fantasies. Nothing about me is smooth, subtle or built for comfort. Those who should be holding this bottle (en route to opening and indulging in what awaits within) are really into ME. Get your cinnamonmochaccino fix elsewhere. This here’s strictly for adult men and women who don’t require the culinary crutch of added fat and sweeteners. My motto: Bold and brave or not at all.